Kevin Carlson: Lyrics / Music

My father passed away in early 1994 and, for years, I tried to make sense out of the whole thing. I must have begun to write a dozen songs about this, but when trying to put everything on paper, all my attempts seemed weak. I had to let many years pass before I could really see the situation clearly and describe what I had felt during our last few months together, specifically, his last truly lucid days in December 1993. It's funny how time and distance often bring things into sharper focus, when it's only natural to suspect the opposite.

I'm still looking for salvation
From the fear
My heart's about to fray
I've tried to understand
Move past the anger
And grief I feel today

But I will remember
The love we shared
That warmed the winter chill
Warmest December
I've ever known
And likely ever will
Those memories stay with me still

December days, I knew they wouldn't stay
When the cold hard truth, took my breath away
But I'd go there once again

Life goes on just like you told me
But still I miss
The guidance of your years
I wish that I could learn
To hear your voice
Just once without these tears

Is there a reason
This couldn't pass you by
This time around
Life's final season
Began so strong
And left without a sound
My heart was so frozen and bound

December days, I knew they wouldn't stay
When the cold hard truth, took my breath away
But I'd go there once again

Feels like no one else could know
The hollowness that goes
With this life sometimes
I’m not so all alone but
I still feel like you were stolen
And I want back what was mine

December days, I knew they wouldn't stay
When the cold hard truth, took my breath away
But I'd go there once again
Yeah I'd go there once again
Just to be with my best friend

Words and Music, © 2007 Shadow Mountain Music LLC (BMI)